Post by Female Guitar Players on Jun 11, 2012 3:08:47 GMT -5
Blog - May 30-2010 Is there anything that makes
« Thread Started on Jul 17, 2010, 5:34pm »
From MySpace
Sunday, May 30, 2010
Q. & A. From Fans - Is there anything that makes your music distinct?
Is there anything that makes your music distinct?
Is there anything that you think makes your music distinct?
Question: Is there anything that you think makes your music distinct?
Answer: Oh boy, that's one hell of a question! I've given this one some deep thought, and I'm not really sure what to say. Over the years, people have told me that my music is not like anything else they have ever heard. I'm not trying to be vain, but I've even been told that some of my music is angelic. One thing I would say about most of my music that makes it unique or distinct, is that I do not sing. And there is a reason for that.
I guess I was about 11 years old, (I might have been 11 or older; I really can't remember), and one day I experienced a very rare and blissful moment with my mother. We were both seated at the piano and she was playing church hymns and I was seated on her right tinkling along up on the higher register pretending to be a great Pianist! She sang like a chicken squawking at a rooster, that woman did! And its not like at the age of 11, I ever made any claims to be able to sing anyways!
Quite unexpectedly, she stopped playing, whorled around on her piano stool, banged my legs, put her hands on my shoulders, shook me violently, and with the meanest face scolded me saying, "Stop singing right now. You sound like a witch and I won't sit beside the devil." I was completely stunned. And that did some terrific damage to me. This rare, beautiful, bonding moment between us, turned into yet another unreasonable and traumatic experience of rejection, separation and condemnation.
From then on, for years, I simply didn't sing. In church, I stood up and just lip-sinked. No one knew that nothing was coming out. I could only sing when no one else was around. I got out of it by becoming the Church Pianist instead. As if what happened wasn't bad enough, when I was 17 or 18 years old, my mother had a recital and I had to perform as the "star". She asked me to play guitar and sing one of my songs. I didn't want to do it but she made me some kind of promise for something, I can't remember now what it was. Right before I was to go in and do this, she took me into the kitchen and said, "Don't sing like a witch or I'll never let you do this again." Damage done.
I went into our living room, and sitting in front of all my piano students and hers, I began to play but nothing would come out of my mouth. It was the absolute most horrific and embarrassing moment of my musical career. From then on, I was only able to sing at school in the choir where my voice was drowned out by everyone elses.
It was not until years later after I left home, and had become an absolute alcoholic and a drug addict, that I was able to sing or even dance again. I was just so riddled with inhibition that my voice would just not come out. After I quit drugs, I was not able to sing or dance anymore. All the inhibitions came right back again. Because of such an abusive childhood, I was taught at a very early age to care more about what everyone else thought of me than what I did. That took a long time to undo.
Now I'm the opposite, perhaps too much; one extreme to the other. The bottom line however, is that, that woman stole the voice of a little girl who probably would have, and should have grown up to have a beautiful voice, if it had been allowed to develop without interference and the restrictions placed around puberty. I am trying really hard to deal with this issue right now. That's why I'm presently working on a song called, "I Can't Sing, But I Can Play, So Can I Still Stay?" I think perhaps many people can relate to this in many ways.
Another thing that makes my music distinct I think is that because I lost my voice at such a young age, I had to compensate in order to express myself. When I began composing music at about 15 years old, I made sure that it spoke for me. My music tells a story. That's why I love to write ballads. People often want to lay down when they listen to my music. They have told me that when they shut their eyes, they see all sorts of things going on. Sometimes they actually see what I have projected into the story of my ballad. It's really quite amazing.
Love and hugs...BlackieSteele...xoxox
(Fan question from 2007-2008)
« Thread Started on Jul 17, 2010, 5:34pm »
From MySpace
Sunday, May 30, 2010
Q. & A. From Fans - Is there anything that makes your music distinct?
Is there anything that makes your music distinct?
Is there anything that you think makes your music distinct?
Question: Is there anything that you think makes your music distinct?
Answer: Oh boy, that's one hell of a question! I've given this one some deep thought, and I'm not really sure what to say. Over the years, people have told me that my music is not like anything else they have ever heard. I'm not trying to be vain, but I've even been told that some of my music is angelic. One thing I would say about most of my music that makes it unique or distinct, is that I do not sing. And there is a reason for that.
I guess I was about 11 years old, (I might have been 11 or older; I really can't remember), and one day I experienced a very rare and blissful moment with my mother. We were both seated at the piano and she was playing church hymns and I was seated on her right tinkling along up on the higher register pretending to be a great Pianist! She sang like a chicken squawking at a rooster, that woman did! And its not like at the age of 11, I ever made any claims to be able to sing anyways!
Quite unexpectedly, she stopped playing, whorled around on her piano stool, banged my legs, put her hands on my shoulders, shook me violently, and with the meanest face scolded me saying, "Stop singing right now. You sound like a witch and I won't sit beside the devil." I was completely stunned. And that did some terrific damage to me. This rare, beautiful, bonding moment between us, turned into yet another unreasonable and traumatic experience of rejection, separation and condemnation.
From then on, for years, I simply didn't sing. In church, I stood up and just lip-sinked. No one knew that nothing was coming out. I could only sing when no one else was around. I got out of it by becoming the Church Pianist instead. As if what happened wasn't bad enough, when I was 17 or 18 years old, my mother had a recital and I had to perform as the "star". She asked me to play guitar and sing one of my songs. I didn't want to do it but she made me some kind of promise for something, I can't remember now what it was. Right before I was to go in and do this, she took me into the kitchen and said, "Don't sing like a witch or I'll never let you do this again." Damage done.
I went into our living room, and sitting in front of all my piano students and hers, I began to play but nothing would come out of my mouth. It was the absolute most horrific and embarrassing moment of my musical career. From then on, I was only able to sing at school in the choir where my voice was drowned out by everyone elses.
It was not until years later after I left home, and had become an absolute alcoholic and a drug addict, that I was able to sing or even dance again. I was just so riddled with inhibition that my voice would just not come out. After I quit drugs, I was not able to sing or dance anymore. All the inhibitions came right back again. Because of such an abusive childhood, I was taught at a very early age to care more about what everyone else thought of me than what I did. That took a long time to undo.
Now I'm the opposite, perhaps too much; one extreme to the other. The bottom line however, is that, that woman stole the voice of a little girl who probably would have, and should have grown up to have a beautiful voice, if it had been allowed to develop without interference and the restrictions placed around puberty. I am trying really hard to deal with this issue right now. That's why I'm presently working on a song called, "I Can't Sing, But I Can Play, So Can I Still Stay?" I think perhaps many people can relate to this in many ways.
Another thing that makes my music distinct I think is that because I lost my voice at such a young age, I had to compensate in order to express myself. When I began composing music at about 15 years old, I made sure that it spoke for me. My music tells a story. That's why I love to write ballads. People often want to lay down when they listen to my music. They have told me that when they shut their eyes, they see all sorts of things going on. Sometimes they actually see what I have projected into the story of my ballad. It's really quite amazing.
Love and hugs...BlackieSteele...xoxox
(Fan question from 2007-2008)